Article originally published in the Philadelphia Business Journal on May 28, 2019
As one who has served in leadership roles and continues to observe many types of leaders, my view of the importance of emotional intelligence has grown. In celebration of my 250th Business Journal article, this is an update of the article I wrote in June 2018 on the importance of emotional intelligence as a key leadership trait.
Is emotional intelligence (emotional quotient) more important than IQ in one’s success? Are street smarts more important than book smarts?
In a 2004 Harvard Business Review article headlined, “Leading by Feel,” University of New Hampshire psychologist John D. Mayer wrote, “Emotional intelligence is the ability to accurately perceive your own and others’ emotions; to understand the signals that emotions send about relationships; and to manage your own and others’ emotions.”
In a 1998 Harvard Business Review article headlined, “What Makes a Leader?” Rutgers University professor Daniel Goleman wrote, “The most effective leaders are alike in one crucial way: They all have a high degree of what has come to be known as emotional intelligence. It’s not that IQ and technical skills are irrelevant. They do matter, but mainly as ‘threshold capabilities’; that is, they are the entry-level requirements for executive positions.
“But my research, along with other recent studies, clearly shows that emotional intelligence is the sine qua non of leadership. Without it, a person can have the best training in the world, an incisive, analytical mind, and an endless supply of smart ideas, but he still won’t make a great leader.”
Based on my own experiences, working for and observing effective and ineffective leaders, I would agree with Goleman that without emotional intelligence, “a person can have the best training in the world, an incisive, analytical mind, and an endless supply of smart ideas, but he [/she] still won’t make a great leader.”
In his article, Goleman identifies five components of EQ. These are:
“Self-awareness: The ability to recognize and understand your moods, emotions and drives, as well as their effect on others.
Self-regulation: The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods … to think before acting.
Motivation: A passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or status.
Empathy: The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people. Skill in treating people according to their emotional reactions.
Social Skill: Proficiency in managing relationships and building networks. An ability to find common ground and build rapport.”
– Daniel Goleman, “What Makes a Leader”
How do these five components of EQ translate into a leader’s day-to-day interactions and effectiveness with the people they deal with? I would like to share with you, based on my experience interacting with others, six EQ behavioral rules that will contribute to your leadership effectiveness.
- Recognize how others perceive youYou should perceive how your words, body language, verbal tone and actions are read by others. If the way you are being read is not desired or effective, you should change. You can tell how you are being perceived by other people’s subtle or not-so-subtle cues.
- Always use your common sense and good critical judgmentMost decisions are made with only limited information, so you need to fall back on your common sense and good critical judgment. Be sure to use them. Ensure you hire people with these two traits. There are too many examples of employees causing economic and reputational harm to the company because they lacked them.
- Don’t communicate with others in a way that puts them on the defensiveCommunicate in a way so people feel respected and valued. Don’t criticize others in public. If you need to give them negative feedback, do it in private. Don’t waste your personal capital correcting individuals on minor irrelevant misstatements of fact. If a correction is necessary, do it in a way so that the individual maintains their dignity and you are not showing how smart you are.
- When a direct report shares an idea or proposes a new initiative, listen.Don’t accept or reject an idea out of hand before vetting it. Show respect by discussing the idea with the direct report, asking them questions on how it might be implemented, its impact and if there could be any unintended consequences.
It’s better to have them reach their own conclusion through dialogue rather than you prematurely telling them what you think. After a dialogue, both of you might have new positions or discover an alternative that is more effective than the original idea.
Value the opinion of the lone wolf within your organization. It takes courage and conviction to go against the grain. Give them a chance to air their views. They might just change your mind.
- Take the blame if it’s your fault. Give credit where credit is dueEveryone makes mistakes. Own up to yours. You will be a much more effective and respected leader if you do. Publicly acknowledge the successes of others. It will motivate them to continue to succeed. And, never throw people under the bus. It destroys trust and any respect people within your organization might have for you.
- Don’t self-aggrandizeAvoid telling everyone how great you are, compared to your predecessors. Don’t blame them for their decisions that you disagree with for the purpose of boosting your own perceived standing. Narcissistic, insecure people do this. It does nothing to win the hearts and minds and earn the respect of your organization and the other people you deal with. It makes you look bad.
So, practice street smarts. Follow these emotional intelligence rules to be a more effective leader.
Stan Silverman is founder and CEO of Silverman Leadership. He is a speaker, advisor and nationally syndicated writer on leadership, entrepreneurship and corporate governance. Silverman earned a Bachelor of Science degree in chemical engineering and an MBA degree from Drexel University. He is also an alumnus of the Advanced Management Program at the Harvard Business School. He can be reached at Stan@SilvermanLeadership.com. Follow Silverman on LinkedIn here and on Twitter, @StanSilverman.
